there was a time in my life where almost every decision started with the same thought.
i’ll do that when...
when i meet someone.
when work settles down.
when i have more money.
when someone wants to come with me.
when life feels less messy.
it sounds sensible.
it’s also a brilliant way to watch years disappear.
somewhere along the way i stopped asking whether anyone else wanted to come.
not because i became fearless.
because i got tired of waiting.
people often think travelling to 81 countries taught me courage.
it didn’t.
courage was walking into a restaurant in my own town by myself for the first time.
ordering a glass of wine.
pretending i wasn’t checking whether everyone was looking at me.
they weren’t.
they were busy living their own lives.
that tiny moment changed far more than boarding a plane ever did.
because once you realise you can sit alone at a table...
you realise you can do almost anything.
people ask me all the time how i became comfortable travelling solo.
the truth is...
i didn’t start with international flights.
i started with lunch.
a country pub.
a winery.
a coffee shop.
a Friday night when staying home would’ve been easier.
those little acts of bravery compound.
they become your identity.
these days people see the adventures.
the mountains.
the wine regions.
the beautiful hotels.
the photos.
what they don’t see is that every single one of those moments started with exactly the same decision.
“go anyway.”
not because i wasn’t scared.
because i refused to let fear make my decisions anymore.
the funny thing is, i spent years thinking i was waiting for the right person.
now i realise i was waiting for someone to give me permission to live the life i wanted.
permission doesn’t arrive.
you give it to yourself.
and something unexpected happens when you do.
your world gets bigger.
you become more interesting.
you trust yourself more.
you stop negotiating with your own life.
does that mean you’ll never feel lonely?
of course not.
i still do.
i still have nights where i’d love someone sitting across the table from me.
i still wonder what life might look like if things had worked out differently.
but those moments don’t stop me living anymore.
they just travel alongside me.
i’ve learnt that there’s a huge difference between being alone...
and putting your life on hold.
one is a circumstance.
the other is a choice.
if you’re reading this because you’ve been thinking about booking the trip...
wearing the outfit...
trying the restaurant...
going to the concert...
or simply taking yourself out for lunch...
this is your reminder.
don’t wait until life looks different.
build the life first.
everything else can catch up.
because the best stories i’ve collected across 81 countries...
didn’t begin with certainty.
they began with one quiet decision.
i’m going anyway.